WELL, ON MONDAY, I WENT TO THE GYNECOLOGIST. HOW FUN! YEAH RIGHT. I DON'T KNOW WHY I ALWAYS GET NERVOUS. WELL, ACTUALLY, I DO KNOW WHY. I MEAN STILL, WHY DO I GET ANXIOUS> I FINALLY HAD TO TELL MYSELF IN THE CAR ON THE FREEWAY, THAT IT'S NO BIG DEAL. THIS GUY GETS PAID TO DO HIS JOB. MY TWAT IS HIS JOB. HE'S LOOKED AT THOUSANDS. SO WHAT'S ONE MORE TO HIS SCHEDULE? I HONESTLY HAD TO TELL MYSELF THIS. HAHAHAH.
The Man Show Deer Hunter
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HE SENT ME HOME WITH A WHOLE BUNCH OF READING MATERIAL. I HAVE BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH PCOS (POLYCYSTIC OVARIAN SYNDROME.)FOR THE PAST TWO YEARS. NO WONDER WHY I GAINED LIKE 60 POUNDS IN NO TIME FLAT, AND IT ALL WENT TO MY MIDSECTION. I'VE NEVER HAD A REGUALAR CYCLE TO RELY ON. HOW NICE WOULD IT BE TO BE ABLE TO KNOW WHEN YOUR GOING TO HAVE IT?! HMMM, I WOULDN'T KNOW.
I ASKED HIM ABOUT INCREASING MY FERTILITY ODDS. I TOLD HIM THE SOONER, THE BETTER. I'M NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER, AND NEITHER IS MY HUBBY. HE IS INCREASING MY DOSAGE OF METFORMIN TO 2000 MG. OMG, I HAD A HELL OF A TIME JUST TAKING ONE PILL OF 500MG. IT MADE ME NOT HUNGRY. NOW I HAVE TO TAKE TWO PILLS TWICE A DAY! HOLY SHIT. I HAD A DIFFICULT TIME TAKING THE SECOND DOSE OF 500MG BECAUSE IT SAID TO TAKE WITH FOOD, AND IF I HAVE AN EMPTY TUMMY, ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE. BUT IT MADE ME NOT WANT TO EAT! NOW WHAT AM I GONNA DO?! FUCK.
I WILL NOT BE TAKING THE BIRTH CONTROL PILLS. WOOHOO. I DO THINK THAT IF I GET PREGO ANYTIME, IT WOULD BE GREAT. I HAVE BEEN HAVING WEIRD DREAMS. I HAD A DREAM I HAD A SON. I CAN'T GET OVER HOW HE LOOKED LIKE MY DAUGHTER WHEN SHE WAS AN INFANT. WEIRD. I'D LOVE TO HAVE TWO MORE KIDS. MINIMUM. I DO WANT A BOY AND ONE MORE GIRL.
GOING THROUGH SECONDARY INFERTILITY IS SHITTY. AT FIRST I THINK, DAMN! MY FIRST PREGNANCY WAS A MISCARRIAGE, MY SECOND WAS MY DAUGHTER, AND THE 3RD DIDN'T HAPPEN. THREE OPPORTUNITIES. I'M THANKFUL THAT I HAVE MARISSA. SHE IS TRULY AMAZING IN MY EYES. MY MIND AND MY HEART KEEP TELLING ME LIKE YOU HAD THREE CHANCES AND ONLY ONE BECAME OF ANYTHING. NOW THIS. INFERTILITY. HMMM. WEIRD. MY HUBBY HAS NO KIDS. I DO WANT US TO REALLY TRY THIS. I'M NOT OK WITH NOT HAVING ANOTHER CHILD.
THE DOC WAS TELLING ME THE DRUGS THAT I COULD TAKE. FIRST I'M ON METFORMIN, A DIABETIC DRUG. (BUT HELPS WITH GETTING PREGO) THEN THE POSSIBILITY OF TAKING CLOMID, (A BREAST CANCER DRUG) AND ANOTHER DRUG TAKEN WITH CLOMID WHICH IS FOR LIVER DISEASE! HAHA. ALL THESE OTHER DRUGS FOR DIFFERENT THINGS! FUCKIN' WEIRD.
ALSO MONDAY NIGHT, I HAD COLLEEN COME OVER TO WATCH A MOVIE. I WAS AT HER HOUSE THE OTHER DAY, AND THE SUBJECT OF MOVIES CAME UP, AND I COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT SHE HAD NEVER SEEN THE MOVIE "POLTERGEIST." THAT MOVIE SCARED THE HELL OUT OF ME WHEN I WAS LIKE 5 YEARS OLD. FUCK THAT NOISE! GODDAMN CLOWN WAS EVIL IN THAT ONE. I EVEN NAMED MY BABY DOLL CAROL ANNE! HAHA. WE HAD POPCORN AND SOME WINE COOLERS. I SLEPT SO GOOD THAT NIGHT.
WELL, I THINK I WILL TRY TO START ADDING A VIDEO AT THE END OF EVERY ENTRY NOW. WE'LL SEE HOW LONG THAT LASTS. HAHA. WELL READERS, ENJOY!